Adopting a baby from overseas orphanages-Why so expensive?
Why charge so much? As one who would consider adopting, you also have to add the plane fares, 1 mth of having to stay in the country of the child...reg baby needs. This is ridiculous to have them growing old in an orphanage, being neglected...when they could have all these babies adopted out as soon as they come in. I am sure they would have many waiting list for a baby, even toddlers would be adopted. It bothers me so much that money is the reason they are not being adopted. Then when they reach teenagers no one wants them, and they end up being thieves, or prostitutes according to the W5 program. They were focusing on Ukraine. Just my rant for the day. |
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| Good point!
It does make no sense. The conditions of these orphanages are deplorable, so it's not like they are putting the money toward that. If they do want these kids to be taken care of and out of there, a lower price would probably help boost adoptions. Speaking of adoptions...this has been on my mind lately. My cousins adopted or I say BOUGHT two kids from what I call a "baby mill" in Texas. This couple was having a baby every nine months and basically sells them. So my cousins adopted two kids from them "real siblings" The kids are brother and sister from this couple or breeding factory as I think of them. I think my cousins paid $50,000 for each kid. It just sickens me that there are people out there selling their kids  I don't know if they are still having kids, but IMO someone needs to neuter this couple!!!
They had a few kids then decided this way a good way to make money. I mean, how can you just give away your own flesh and blood time after time and not think twice about???...all they see is $$$$ Didn't mean to hijack your thread but this really bother me. It's been on my mind a lot lately. |
| Ever since I was little I knew that I wanted to adopt when I grew up. Before getting married I made sure my husband felt the same way. For him it was also a decision of bad genetics, not wanting to pass down some of the terrible things we carry to any child of ours.
As I'm old enough to start thinking about a family, I realize how expensive it is to adopt anywhere. Not that this has changed my opinion or desire to go through with it, I just realize why so few people do adopt. I know quite a few that foster and then adopt that way, making it a little easier. Right now I'm deathly afraid to even get started on the process. In fact, if it wasn't as daunting as it is, I would probably look into it now. I figure a few more years and then I should be ready. How strange to have to save to have a child. I wish that the process wasn't so expensive so that there weren't so many kids without homes.  |
| This is a good topic. My husband and I have wanted to adopt for a while now. There are many reasons involved, but I've wanted to adopt since I was a child. My mom is adopted, so it's part of my past. We haven't been able to get into the adoption process because it is sooo expensive. Most of the fees come from legal issues. You don't want to bring your new baby home and ten years down the road have someone else claim her or him. You have to pay for a lawyer, or the country's legal processor, etc. It is very expensive. Usually (at least in the states) you also need to pay for most of the birth mother's expenses while she is pregnant. Housing if needed, perhaps even clothing, and definitely the hospital expenses. It all adds up and it is so expensive. It's very frustrating for Ian and I as all we want to do is give a child a permanent loving home.
Another interesting side note, while I was in college I took a class on Asian studies and an American mother came and spoke about how she adopted her son from China. It is always different in every country and every individual situation, but we learned an interesting point about cultures in general. China has an incredibly long and pretty pure history. When a Chinese child is born, their bloodlines go back thousands and thousands and thousands of years. The Chinese culture is rich in their past, and it can be difficult to adopt a child from China out to just another country, even if over-population is a huge issue. It is almost like breaking off some of China's deep traditions and history. I really enjoyed this class because it gave me such a better perspective (obviously an outsiders':roll: ) on Chinese culture. |
| A couple in church adopted twin girls from Ukraine. They are beautiful girls. I don't know old they were when they were adopted, but today they are two beautiful pre-teens. When you consider all the government officials that need their cut, it's no wonder it costs so much.
susan |
| I have a friend who is adopting a baby girl from China. They have about $25,000 invested so far, and they just had to do their paperwork, fingerprints, and home study again since the last set expired (which they had to pay even more for). They're good people, good parents, they'll take care of the baby and provide for it well. It just doesn't make any sense why it does cost so much. |
| That's just crazy, how can they make them redo something when it was not their fault they are behind schedule.
The world is so greedy, and the only ones that suffer are the innocent babies. I am all for having home studies, and background checks etc, it the costs of everything else. Esp when these countries get to set their prices. $25,000 to have a baby, and I am sure they already exhausted the invitro route, another expensive endeavor. Imagine what kind of education fund you would have, or a beautiful house for a growing family. I would imagine that a person would be completely tapped out by the time they actually get the baby, that instead of having a beautiful home with all the best of baby things...they need to penny pinch. Then of course you would want a sibling in a couple years... It would be nice to see all the deserving families get their babies and have a family, without having to go broke to do it. Just crazy. Then because you are broke, and sold off your best things, a couple years down the road the backlash of it all could potentially be divorce, one blames the other because they had to have this baby, and resentment sets in. I'd like to see some studies done on what happens to adoptive parents, and the backlash of life after it finally happens, and they spend $30,000....and how it all could have been avoided if they only had to cover legal fees, certificates, and plane tickets to get the baby...I am sure that some of these costs are not necessary, and can be removed completely. But I've never gone that route, so I don't know who is getting the money.... |
| I think it's because it's only legit for a year...the Chinese have rules about that. She's already went the donor/in-vitro route for her first two children (her husband can't have kids), so yeah, that was pricey too. I feel bad for them. They've been waiting over a year for this baby, they've spent so much money, and they still haven't even done the trip. That's going to be expensive too. All they want is a baby to love, it shouldn't be quite so hard. |
| So are they already assisgned to a specific baby, or once it's all finalized then they can pick which one they want?
That would be so sad that they pick a newborn or one only a few months, then they don't get him/her until a year+ later...they are not getting a baby anymore. Now they have a toddler, learning a chinese language...more barriers. For me, I'd go through the whole process, make the trip visit all the babies and want to pick the one I felt a connection with. Who knows it may be a toddler...but I would want the option. Esp if they have soooo many needing homes. I hope they get their baby soon, and everything goes smoothly from here on. |
To be honest, I'm not really sure. She calls the baby by the name they've picked out, but I've never seen any pictures of her. I'll have to figure out a way to ask, I'm curious now.  |
| It seems so strange to think of human children in the same situations as animals, without a home, in a shelter of sorts,... human development is so complicated, those first five years have SO much to do with who they beceome (IMO)
It would be so nice to see things more organized, so that a baby who is given up for adoption has a home to go to immediately, starting it's life out as any child should be able to. A family who has been waiting, has had all home checks etc done, should be matched up immediately with a baby given up instead of making that child spend the first year or more of his or her life in limbo. |
| It just seems so simple to me to take money out of the equation, and the orpahanges could be empty...in one comes and out it goes the next week...less stress and money spent all around.
Then do something for the mothers, or make them spend money on education of sex, and birth control, drugs, alcohol...educate them to the betterment of the individual and control the birth of unwanted babies. If I was spending $30,000 before I got to get the baby, I'd do it if I knew the money was being spent to stop the problem, fix the conditions of these orpnanges, educate and give out Birth control....instead of lining the greedy pockets of gov't authoritys. |
Daisie wrote: It just seems so simple to me to take money out of the equation, and the orpahanges could be empty...in one comes and out it goes the next week...less stress and money spent all around.
Then do something for the mothers, or make them spend money on education of sex, and birth control, drugs, alcohol...educate them to the betterment of the individual and control the birth of unwanted babies. If I was spending $30,000 before I got to get the baby, I'd do it if I knew the money was being spent to stop the problem, fix the conditions of these orpnanges, educate and give out Birth control....instead of lining the greedy pockets of gov't authoritys. One country they were going to go through - can't remember which country it was in but it was a Central American orphanage - refused to let them adopt because her husband is on his third marriage. I kinda can understand it, but he and his first wife just married too young and weren't ready. Then, his second wife cheated on him so they divorced. Him and his current wife (my friend) have been married for 12 years now and still going strong. I can understand if you're marrying and divorcing every few years, but after having been married that long and still have a strong marriage, I don't understand why they wouldn't let them adopt. |
| That's silly, 12 yrs these days is a huge accomplishment. We've been married for 8 yrs now, and still face bumps in the road, and deal with them.
I agree if a couple was facing divorce every couple years, or one partner had issues that make it iffy. But when one is proven even 5 yrs...they should consider the couple as an individual case by case. 12 yrs, poor couple must have been so mad, I sure would have been. Noone could gaurantee the future, and alot of what I read is a single person can adopt a special needs child...why couldn't a divorced couple still raise a healthy child...at least one of them?? You'd think they'd be the opposite, that special needs must have two parents, but healthy children can have one parent. |
| I don't know anything about the adoption process (in any country) other than general things I hear here and there. I understand the thought that spending X amount on a baby seems like a lot of money, but can you imagine if you could get a baby for free...there are huge child prostitution rings out there and child trafficking and if the bad people could get their hands on some cheap children...even for child labor in factories.
It doesn't seem fair to have some good people want to adopt these children and either can't afford them or have to go through huge amounts of red tape and time, but they are trying to ensure the child goes to a home that will be better than the orphanage they came from. |
| If your a celebrity it does not seem to matter, money talks, which is a pity and very sad for those genuinely wanting and needing a child and could probably make a better and more stable enviroment for them.
My Sis could not have children, she went through IVF and everything, she would of been a fantastic and loving mom as she is just wonderful with my children. They looked into adoption here, but with single mom pensions etc years and years of wait for a baby if not at all. They looked into overseas adoption too from any country, even a special needs baby, but the red tape here and the money involved was just way out of there league!!. So she has just accepted that she will not be a mom but her role as auntie to my kids is wonderful, we try to involve her in everything the boys are doing. Unfortunately Money, Fame etc. gives you a golden ticket to get what others desperately want. I did not see Angelina Jolie cutting through red tape to adopt her O/S babies, she just turned up with them one day, like so many other celebs. Hugh Jackson is one here that had no problems either, yet there are many on long waiting lists and also those that do not have the mega bucks to go ahead with it. In china it is really sad as baby girls are thrown away or killed at birth in preference to boys because of the one child policy, mostly in the farming and poorer areas, boy it would be nice to give a baby girl a loving home without all the politics and red tape. I don't understand either why all this money is demanded to give some unfortunate soul a loving family, look at Romania and the children in those orphanges too, africa, philipines, india and so on and so on |
barney1 wrote: but can you imagine if you could get a baby for free...there are huge child prostitution rings out there and child trafficking and if the bad people could get their hands on some cheap children...even for child labor in factories.
It doesn't seem fair to have some good people want to adopt these children and either can't afford them or have to go through huge amounts of red tape and time, but they are trying to ensure the child goes to a home that will be better than the orphanage they came from. I totally agree with you, but that is why they have background checks, police reports, health of families, neighbour reports, doctor reports, work reports....they expect you to be 100% healthy, and provide a good home for the babies. Bring on the background checks....what is wrong is that they charge X amount of money for that child, then you buy 3 plane tickets..you, hubby and baby, you are expected to stay in their country for 1 week-1 mth (must pay for hotel), pay for all legal fees in both countries, not to mention you at home must prepare for the child, take a leave of abscense from work...$20,000 later they can still say no too. I don't want to see bad people get their hands on these children....but they make it so hard for the good people to get them too. These children grow up and become prostitutes and thieves...and they don't bother to fix the problem, it becomes a vicious circle. |
| I read an article in the paper yesterday that's related to this topic. It was about the amount of money that young women are paid to be egg donors for couples with fertility issues. I guess the market for eggs in CA is BOOMING. People come from all over the world to get implanted with eggs from young, hot "California girls". Since the price offered for eggs is going up in CA they've started marketing to AZ college students as well. If you're a college student with good looks and decent grades you can be paid $4000 and up to go through one cycle of egg harvesting, yielding anywhere from 1 to over 20 eggs.
And it made me really sad - with all the children in the world who desperately need homes, why have we created an entire new industry to mass produce more babies? I guess the parents would say that the baby is more "theirs" if the father's sperm is used and the mother has the chance to give birth. But it just makes me sad to think of childbirth as an "industry". |
JakobandBrandonsmom wrote: To be honest, I'm not really sure. She calls the baby by the name they've picked out, but I've never seen any pictures of her. I'll have to figure out a way to ask, I'm curious now.
Okay, I forgot to ask her.  They did get their referral today though, and she got pictures of her little girl, which she e-mailed to everyone. They take their trip to China in about 2 months! |
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