I'm not sure how to answer that.
I am a very thoughtful person. I think about things. I analyze them. I never accept one person's view as my own; I tend to and work very hard at seeing all sides of an issue, with as open a mind as possible.
There are many things and issues around us that have many people on one side or another. I enjoy talking and hearing about all sides of an issue. I like putting forth "straw man" arguments and having people shoot them down. Sometimes, they turn out to be made of more than straw. Sometime they can be the salient issue, the piece that can help me make up my mind.
An issue on our board that recently arose was whether it is good or bad to pay a nominal amount, say $25, to rescue a dog from a mill, that would otherwise be euthanized. I don't know the answer to that question. We actually lost at least one member due to that conversation. I don't like that, and it made me sad that someone could feel that strongly about a single issue, and a discussion about it, to leave. So be it. I want to discuss it.
If you feel like you're getting hot under the collar about an issue, please feel free to comment on it, as politely as possible! Remember my mantra here: "Write your posts as if you are sitting at your kitchen table sharing a cup of tea with your neighbor who you don't know very well."
Or move on to another post, or to another section of the forum.
Harmony is our most important asset. If I find that this section of the forum is detrimental to our community I will shut it down quickly. I'd prefer that didn't happen! I'm interested in what you think about things!
|I also like to speak my mind about topics at times, but I always try to do it as a matter of opinion. We are each entitled to different feelings and opinions. However, if I feel someone is just being rude and ignorant, I will stop participating in that topic and move onto something else. It's never made me leave a forum.....boredom is the cause for that.|
|Ron, I agree with you 100% we can all have our thoughts on each post. BUT do it wilh thought. This is a great site. I look forward everyday to get on board and see thoughts and pics - EVERYTHING. Please give your best when posting. I have met so many chatters who I have thought were so nice . Infact everyone is nice. I am sure we all have strong opinions on many things, just let everyone have theirs. You don't have to agree.
THANKS RON FOR THIS SITE.
|My opinion is my opinion.... Of course at times I will think it should be the only opinion that matters...but that's at home... lol
|Controversy? Why would someone wonder that? We should always try to remain polite, but the one thing that we must remember is that we're on this forum by choice. When we chose to start a thread or post a reply we opened the door to critisism, compliments, conversation and controversy. We change our own minds on some things so often that, that in itself, shows we can't even agree with ourself all the time, so why would or should we expect anything different from anyone else?
We need to remember that a short post doesn't contain the entire thought or story, only the shortest possible version of it. We need to agree to disagree. And know that thats ok. That's what makes us individuals and enables us teach or learn from one other.
If something is said that causes hurt feelings, express it. If you said it, apologize for the "tone." Apoloizing for hurt feelings soothes things over without changing your opinions, but makes everyone feel better.
|I find in often helps in controversial issues to keep to the "I" word: "I think..." or "in my opinion..." etc. and avoid directing negative remarks toward the contrary opinion(s). By the same token, if someone feels slighted by an opposing statement, it is proper to express his/her feelings, again without accusations or implications that there was intentional offense.
Discussions on controversial opinions are good and necessary because they open our minds to other's points of view and promote respect for one another.
Glad you sent this up the flagpole, Ron; I certainly salute it.
|Differing opinions and discussion also may show you another way of thinking about a topic or it may actually strengthen your side of the argument.
When we examine all sides of a topic it helps us to get a better idea of where and why we stand for what we do.
|I've learned an awful lot on this site so far by reading the opinions posted by the members. I hope everyone continues to have thoughtful discussion on issues that can't be answered by a simple "yes" or "no". Hopefully the airing of different opinions will make us all realize how many shades of gray there are in some of these controversial topics.|
|I like the way things can be freely discussed here on this forum,and that everyone's opinion matters and I think for the most part people are polite in their disagreements. I have left another forum because I was getting personal nasty emails, because I had the nerve to disagree with the 'powers that be'. At first I was very hurt. I was trying to help a situation. Now...I'm over it but I still do not participate in that forum. Their loss|
Now...I'm over it but I still do not participate in that forum. Their loss
|I love the way opinions are accepted in this forum, even on very controversial issues. We're very open to other people's opinions and there's something always to say, and they way the community self-regulates most of the time.
Controversy for the sake of controversy is not good, but when something can come up from a good discussion about a topic you consider important, I'm up for it! When you have intelligent memebers that can see that an opinion is not a personal attack (Like many, many of our members), you have a healty community that grows and learns from other people's experiences and toughts.
Keep up the discussions, and Hazaaa For Ron and this great Forum!
|I do believe it was my post Ron is referring to. If I offended you, I am truly sorry. That was not my intent. My fingers aren’t always capable of putting down what is rattling around in my brain.
I am the mother of a handicapped son. For 20 years I have been fighting for him with doctors, insurance companies, schools, the public, the government any many others. A lot of times over things most of us take for granted. I worked with special needs children for 13 years and have friends who have service or guide dogs and we are working with Mojo to become a service dog for Jonathon. Even with the ADA, there are still so many doors that will be a long time in opening. If service dogs weren’t allowed, there are so many whose lives would come to a complete stop. A couple of months ago we almost lost Jonathon. We are still struggling to keep him healthy. It has been a very emotional time. The category is “food for thought” and I took it too personally and attacked you personally.
Again I sincerely apologize.
|There is no need for apology, I thought it was a fair question, and a good question! I absolutely didn't take it as an attack of any kind.
I'm sorry for your struggles and your first hand experience on the issue. It's exactly your type of input that's important to me.
Let me ask you, from your perspective; What about people with allergies and their rights, and rights of restauranteurs to open an establishment of their choosing? Perhaps you've been able to give this better and/or more thought than I have!
|It is indeed an interesting question. Yes, a person with allergies has a right to go where they choose and a person with a service dog has a right to go where they choose too. I really don’t know the answer. It is one of those gray areas. For society to function there needs to be a balance of give and take.
Allergies are problem we deal with. Jonathon is highly allergic to latex. Knowing this, we take responsibility for his safety. You would be amazed at how much latex is out there. Doctor and dentist visits are scheduled early so that the power off of gloves is not heavy in the air. People always want to hand him a balloon. Toys and clothes have to be examined before he can have them. Halloween mask, scratch off lottery tickets, chewing gum, almost any tool or utensil with a rubber handle, erasers and the inside of band-aid wrappers, perfume sample and envelopes with rubber cement can all be deadly for him. Yes, he has the right to make an appointment in the afternoon. But that is one of our “gives” for his condition. We know where the hazards are and work around them and are on constant vigil for the unknown. Hopefully, common sense and courtesy will keep us all safe and in harmony.
|Life is interesting in the grey areas.
I don't like the idea of a restaurant where service dogs are excluded, yet sometimes I'd like to go where they are excluded. I don't like the idea of "separate but equal", but shouldn't people be allowed to associate with whom they please? Unfortunately, that leads to all sorts of discrimination.
I worry about the government being involved in daily decisions, but I worry that without the government a lot of daily decisions would be wrong.
I am glad, personally, that service dogs are allowed. I am also thankful that the number of service dogs and the number of people with bad allergies to them are small enough that this problem doesn't occur 1,000 times a day. At least not to my knowlege.
Clearly service dogs are the law of the land. Clearly, there is no compelling sanitation issue to prevent all dogs from eating establishments. After all, I find it hard to believe that service dogs would be allowed if people were going to get sick from their presence in the restaurant.
So why can't I open a restaurant that caters to people and their dogs?
I know, how about a pet store that serves human food as a convenience (instead of the other way 'round)? Why can't they serve people food at dog food stores? Are they afraid the people will make the dogs sick? Unfortunately, the law is that if you want to serve food, you are a restaurant. Too bad.
|Ron, they do have restaurants that allow dogs and even have dog items on the menu. They are getting more prevalent, but they aren't quite taking over the world yet.
I think that service dogs are fine and great and useful and I don't mind them in restaurants or other public places where typically one would not bring a dog. They are performing a duty. It is their job to be there. But I would not like to go to a restaurant (a regular restaurant) necessarily that allowed dogs willy nilly. To me a dog or 2 isn't a health issue and they aren't going to make people sick, but if let's say, there is a 30 person capacity in a restaurant, and there are 20 dogs in there, that's a lot of drool and shedding hair and potential fighting or general activity on the dogs' part. That to me starts to seem like a potential health issue. And we all seem to be rational, common sense-filled people on this forum, but many many people are not.
People have the right to choose where they go and don't go (when it comes to restaurants and shops and that sort of thing). If I don't like eating with a million dogs, I won't go to the neighborhood people/dog restaurant, just like I am sad, but won't be able to go to any of the fun new restaurants in town here because of the massive amount of smoking that occurs.
It's like my friend who is deathly allergic to nuts. He can't go to Asian restaurants, even if his meal is steamed and hasn't touched anything with a nut, because he knows how sensitive he is and he knows it would be best to stay away...
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