Heart has lymphoma
At 6 years and 4 months old? How could I have missed whatever signs there might have been to catch this early enough for it to have made a difference? How can I keep the tears away, and live in today, knowing that, in a matter of about 3 months, she will not be here? How can I ever look at my shoes, side by side, when every morning she takes at least on of them and carries it to the back door to potty?How will I ever go to the bathroom alone again? How can I listen to her breathing, wondering if she is in pain or panic from not getting enough air? WHY?????? I am so mad!!! So sad....And, I know she can sense it.And I don't want her to..I want to give her the best 3 months I can. She will eat whatever she wants, whenever she wants. And I will spend every minute I can giving her love that will last a lifetime (for me). I wasn't going to post this until after Nationals. I told Judi I didn't want anyone to know, but, I am weak and I need all of your support and Heart needs all of your love. Dino and I have decided that we are not going to put her through any chemo. We will get her the meds she needs to keep her comfortable, but no heroic measures. I have always loved the Nationals. The friendships, the laughter. and all those wonderful sheepies. It is fitting that this last National for my girl will be in her hometown where she can sleep in her own house, pee in her own backyard, and be with me and Dino. From this forum, I need your support, comfort and unconditional love...I am not ready to lose this precious gift, but I can do nothing to stop it. |
|
|
| Wow Val. So so sad to hear this. I think you and Dino are right about the chemo. We did that for our Cocker and I think all it did was extend the enevitable along with the pain and not as good of a quality of life the we hoped for. You're in a great group and we'll all be here for you, Heart and even Dino. Thinking of you all, Vance, Jen, Zoey and Caitlyn |
| Thanks Vance...I so appreciate your thoughts and prayers..and with memories of what a great time we had in Ohio~~You helped me make mental picture of Heart and Dino in the middle of all those sheepies, to last in my heart forever. It was the first time Dino ever went to a sheepie event with me and we had so much fun! |
Oh Val.... my heart stopped when I read this. I wish I had magic words of comfort... All I can say is you have my sympathy, and lots of prayers going up for all of you. Heart has a great Mommy who will make certain her time here is filled with love and special memories.  (((( HUGS))))))  |
| Val, the only memory I personally have of Heart is perfect. It's from the Sheep-In and Heart all but refused to go in the fenced area with all the other Sheepies. She feared loosing her bling and God forbid she'd get dirty. Heart was very content to sit with you and Dino outside. What a perfect image of a beautiful girly girl. Nothing like our Caity, that's for sure. Hang in there Val. You St. Louis lot are a tough bunch. Vance, Jen, Zoey and Caitlyn |
Reading about Heart brought tears. I am so sorry. I can only imagine the heartache you are going through right now. I know with our Pooh Bear when we found out about his liver tumor and another carcinoma, I felt like the wind was let out of me with a big punch in my heart. We will always be here for you. This community of people helped with my healing. Big hugs to you and Heart. |
 We are all so devastated in this household. This whole family loves Heart. My boys like hearing stories about her as well as Harry. And with our two growing up together this whole time Tim and I are like her Uncle and Aunt. I am still having trouble processing this because she was just so full of exuberant life when I saw her two weekends ago. And of course we are upset for you and Dino as well. This is so darn unfair but we are with you all the way in making these last days for her the best they can be. Harry is available for her to shurtle him as much as she wants. He loves her so much. |
| Oh Val, my tears will not stop. This is a very sad day indeed. Thank you for sharing the news. We will all be together in losing our beloved Heart We opted for chemo with Chloe's lymphoma but her remission was only three months. In that time, we threw the rules out the window and lived for her. She was known in most drive thru's, banks and pharmacies, preferred the Burger King double buck to McDonald chicken nuggets, and spent her time snuggling on the couch and bed. Those memories bring me such comfort now. I know they will for you and Dino in time Our hearts are breaking for you. Rocky, Charm and I send your family hugs and slurpy sheepie kisses. Please give Heart lots of hugs, treats and kisses from us. Keeping you close in heart and prayers |
| Oh no!! I'd be mad as well as devastated too. Such a fine lady, it's not fair. I too agree with your decision......I've done both. The extra months are not worth the dog's discomfort. Yep, time to do what she wants, when and where, etc. |
| I have no words for you except to extend my deepest sympathy. I hope her last months are the best they can be for you and Dino too. |
| I knew you were worried about her but I had never thought to hear that diagnosis. My heart is breaking for you and Dino, as you know. Just love her! |
| |
| OH NOOO! Val, I cannot believe I'm reading this. I'm speechless. I am so sorry to hear this. Heart is such a special girl and she's touched so many people, including many of this board's members. We all have our Heart stories that we'll carry with us as long as we live. We will be right there with you, supporting you and Dino, and mourning with your family. |
| I'm so glad you came here for our support. I am beyond sad for you, Dino, the kids and all of us who have known Heart since she was little. I was going to send you a message if you didn't tell us publicly. I have been Ali's sounding board with this for the past several days, and she made me promise not to say anything until you did. I have been grieving for you guys.  My 1st Heart meeting was of course in St Louis and our 1st Sheepiepalooza...and thereafter. And then in MN, bullying you into trying rally and obedience in the match  I agree with you on the comfort measures. My dad actually chose the same thing for himself with his cancer diagnosis. It was a sad thing initially for me as a daughter and nurse, but choosing quality days over quantity days is often a better option. Looking back, it was best. And my memories are more of my dad as I wanted to remember him too.  And you know I will be there soon to give you REAL hugs. |
| Thank you everyone....I am glad I chose to share my devasting news with all of you. I hope to see some of you at Nationals (Dawn)...and please don't be upset if you a tear or two from me, I am grateful that everyone here knows exactly what I am going through and can understand my feelings my helplessness...From the bottom of my heart.... |
sheepieshake wrote: Thank you everyone....I am glad I chose to share my devasting news with all of you. I hope to see some of you at Nationals (Dawn)...and please don't be upset if you a tear or two from me, I am grateful that everyone here knows exactly what I am going through and can understand my feelings my helplessness...From the bottom of my heart.... Val, I will be bawling right along with you...heck even now just sitting here I am. |
| I am so sad for you right now. This is just wrong. Wish I could give you a hug in person. Laurie and Oscar |
| I will see you a week from Monday and don't expect me to be dry eyed. We got our pups a week apart from each other. Nigel will forever remind me of Heart. We are here for you hon. |
| I am so sorry - it's too sad. Heart. Do not know what to write........ You'll give her the best time ever in the last months, and that's great! Wish we could change what happens - life is too tough on us sometimes. Take care. |
| I am soooo sorry to hear this. |
| Val, I'm shocked beyond belief and have thought of nothing else since hearing this devastating news. I have no idea what to say that will help comfort you right now, just know that we are all here for you and Dino. |
| Val, I am truly devastated for you . I know how rough the next few months will be for you and Dino and am sad there is nothing we can really do to make it better. You can only do what you are already doing and that is to make as many treasured memories as possible. And when Heart's journey ends we all be here to help you carry the burden of your loss |
| I am so sorry, I am in shock. I am sending all my positive thoughts and prayers for you and Dino. The loss of our best friends is never easy. Heart will love being spoiled. |
| i know i am not supposed to post here anylonger but this time i just cannot. When Val called me last week I thought: oh, she just has a cold or something.........but then the nagging suspecion started in on me. When she called me back Monday my "heart" dropped into my stomach.... I had other issues I am still going thru to get by yesterday. As soon as that call was finished I called Val. I am devestated. I am sick to death. I just cannot believe this. No one deserves it to happen, but least of all Val, Dino and little HEART I cried and cried last night. and today too.I'm trying to read up and learn and have talked to vets over this. They all tell me it is nothing *I* did as her breeder, but that is the type of person I am. All of my kids are going in for 'checks". I have TRIED to call the Stud dogs breeder but she doesn't speak anymore, so i have no idea what is back there on that side. I've tried everything i know. I am just sick. Sick for HEART, SICK for VAL and DINO and sick for me..... as i loved little Heart so much too. Ron do what you want for me posting here but I just had to. I am so in shock over this. Ali \ |
| Val, I also am in total shock! How can this be??? It's so unfair!! I always loved hearing the Heart stories. I totally agree with your decision to forego chemo. I know you will spoil her rotten and that's as it should be. We are all here for you and Dino. We'll get you through this devastating time, and through your grief after. We all feel like we are losing our own dog - that's how much a part of everyone's life Heart has been, whether we've met you in person or not. Enjoy the Nationals. It will do you good to see a lot of people from here, and get some comfort in person. Hugs to you and Dino, and belly rubs for that precious Heart.  |
 There are no words to describe how devastating this news is. |
Abuckie wrote: Oh Val.... my heart stopped when I read this. I wish I had magic words of comfort... All I can say is you have my sympathy, and lots of prayers going up for all of you. Heart has a great Mommy who will make certain her time here is filled with love and special memories. (((( HUGS)))))) just no words |
| I am so sorry for you and Heart, this is totally unfair. |
| So sorry to hear this I agree with your decision not to do chemo. It is too tough and I know plenty of humans who say they would have rather not done the chemo. So, I agree....keep her comfortable and love her every single minute... Please always come here for support. We will get you through this. That is what friends are for. Sending prayers and positive thoughts.... |
| Such awful news. Adam and I are horribly sad to hear this. We both send our love and best wishes. |
My Heart  My heart is broken. I am so sorry Val I am so sorry I am so sorry. Ever since I first saw pictures of her, she has been very special to me, and both Sheepiepaloozas the highlight was meeting her and squishing her. I can't believe this she is such a special girl this is wrong. I am so sorry Val. |
| Val, I'm so very sorry. You are not weak. I'm glad you didn't keep this in until after the national. You'll need all the love and support you can get and yes, there will be lots of tears and hugging. That's what friends are for. We will all be crying together. Ben was also perfectly healthy and didn't act any different. I found the swollen glands in his neck and thought the same thing, maybe he had an infection. He never did act sick with this disease. I tried to blame myself by thinking maybe he was neutered to early, should he not have gotten certain vaccines, etc. He was so young. You didn't do anything wrong. Cancer sucks. Cherish and enjoy every moment you have with her. Be sad for now, but then be happy with her because you know they know our true feelings. She'll need lots of happy thoughts to try to beat this disease off for as long as she can to stay with you and Dino. Cindy |
| There just are no words. I'll see you in a week. |
| Val-- so heartbroken for you and Dino. Heart is truly a special girl and knows she is so very loved and cherished by both of you. Heart stole my heart the first time I met her--and her pictures always bring a smile. Even David had tears last night when I told him the sad news. So glad I will be able to give you both a hug next week. I know there is so little that anyone can say or do to ease your pain, but know we are here and understand the love you have for your very special girl. |
| No, no, no, NO!! Words fail me I can only feel disbelief and emphatic denial! Val, I'm so sorry. Wayne knows who Heart is and he is so upset too. I'm so sorry and am grieving with you. |
| Val: I am so sorry, such terrible, terrible news. The depth of sadness are too deep. I remember that little bling girl just after she was born with that fuzzbally thing and a big heart right there into her fur. I remember the weekly updates as Heart and her litter got bigger and finally went to their homes. Heart is a lucky girl, beside all of her bling, she has the best Mommy and Daddy. I've enjoyed all of the Heart stories/pics. I've never met her in person, but it doesn't matter, I know what a great girl she is. This news is devastating to all of us. We are your friends and will help you through it all. I pray for strength for you and your family and sweet sheepei girl Heart, who has come into our lives and touched so many. Hang in there, we're here for you. |
| I am so sorry for this awful news.. hugs from Domino and myself |
| I am so sorry. This makes me cry like it is one my own. Thinking of you. |
| Thank you..Everyone...the love and support from this wonderful forum of friends has deeply touched my Heart (and Dino's too) It has only been 3 days since this devastating news but it seems like a life time. I am grateful for this group and the messages have me in tears...but they are tears of contentment, that, when she is gone, many will have memories of her life...that she made a difference..that she mattered to more people than just her small pack here in St. Louis. And for now...I will be celebrating her life, her spirit, her joy. She will be attending the Nationals in all her blingy glory and she will be smiling and looking up at faces that love her as she waits for pats, pets hugs and kisses. ...I am overwelmed by your caring,by your concern. Thank you...and 'we' really hope to see you at Nationals. Love...to all...Heart and her mommy |
| I wish we could attend nationals, just to give you and Dino a hug, and squish Heart. You will be in our thoughts and prayers. Lisa Frankie and Mattie |
| I am so sorry. |
babysheepie wrote: I wish we could attend nationals, just to give you and Dino a hug, and squish Heart. Same here for us. |
| Oh goodness, Val! I'm so very sorry you are going through this with Heart. You and your dogs have always touched me from my early days on the forum with chats about Annie and then when we came to St Louis for Sheepiepalooza with Fozzie years back. You are so welcoming and we had a great time! Sending our love across the miles! |
| Val, I am so sorry. I love the Heart stories you post. I lost my golden Retriever to lymphoma 3 years ago. It is sad to say, but it is so common in Goldens now that it is more of a surprise when they don't have it. We only had a very short time after diagnosis, because they are so good at hiding their discomfort. |
| Val, I'm so sorry this is happening. I'm sending you prayers and good thoughts. |
| Those darn swollen glands..........I'm just paranoid about feeling the dogs' neck. Two Lympho dogs, Harry's throat cancer (talk about a swelling!) and with Kensie I constantly have my hands around her neck........feeling for lumps. Heart will be Bling-ed to the Max at Nationals.......we want lots of pictures!! |
| I'm thinking it might be nice if we ALL bling out our sheepies, as a sign of love and solidarity! I won't be at Nationals; but maybe we could post photos from home? (Having suggested this, I'm now realizing that we have no bling....) |
| Val I just saw this and read all of the posts. I have never met Heart but I fell in love with her from all of the stories and pictures. I know how devastated you both are. We lost a Westie several years ago to nose cancer. My thoughts and prayers go out to you. Enjoy her while you can. I know she will enjoy all of the love and attention. Remember we are all here for you. |
| Val, omg, not Heart! I am so very sad for you. Heart has always been so special. How lucky for her to have had you and Dino and especially now. Hugs and prayers......This is unthinkable. |
| Val, I am so saddened to read this. Heart is one of the biggest sweethearts I've ever met. She will be missed, but I know you will make the most of the time she has left. |
| Val, my heart aches for you. I am so sorry. We made the same decision for Lacy - no chemo. The prednisone gave her almost as much time but she felt better. I hope Heart has relief, too. |
sheepieshake wrote: I found out yesterday. And I am still trying to wrap my head around it. How can a perfectly healthy dog get cancer? At 6 years and 4 months old? How could I have missed whatever signs there might have been to catch this early enough for it to have made a difference? How can I keep the tears away, and live in today, knowing that, in a matter of about 3 months, she will not be here? How can I ever look at my shoes, side by side, when every morning she takes at least on of them and carries it to the back door to potty?How will I ever go to the bathroom alone again? How can I listen to her breathing, wondering if she is in pain or panic from not getting enough air? WHY?????? I am so mad!!! So sad....And, I know she can sense it.And I don't want her to..I want to give her the best 3 months I can. She will eat whatever she wants, whenever she wants. And I will spend every minute I can giving her love that will last a lifetime (for me). I wasn't going to post this until after Nationals. I told Judi I didn't want anyone to know, but, I am weak and I need all of your support and Heart needs all of your love. Dino and I have decided that we are not going to put her through any chemo. We will get her the meds she needs to keep her comfortable, but no heroic measures. I have always loved the Nationals. The friendships, the laughter. and all those wonderful sheepies. It is fitting that this last National for my girl will be in her hometown where she can sleep in her own house, pee in her own backyard, and be with me and Dino. From this forum, I need your support, comfort and unconditional love...I am not ready to lose this precious gift, but I can do nothing to stop it. Gosh, so sorry, Val. I really cannot feel your pain, but certainly understand it. Losing our best friend is devasting. Fortunately you have so many good memories and fun times to reflect upon just thinking about Heart which should bring some comfort. We will all be thinking of you and Dino and Heart. |
| Thanks everyone...I can't tell you how much I appreciate your caring and kindness. |
| OMGOSH. This is so so sad. I am so sorry to hear this and I know there are no words to help. Cancer is such an evil disease, makes me so mad too. Heart is one of the first sheepies pictures I have always admired on this forum when I first got Ramsey. I love all her bling, her bows, what a beauty! She will always be a beauty and keep making her, her beautiful self throughout all this. Much and many hugs! |
| Thanks Brigit...that is my plan!!!!! |
| So very sorry to read this Val. Give her the best 3 months of her life and turn her loose at the Rainbow Bridge when the time is right. |
| Val, you and dino are doing the right thing no chemo, over the years I have not known anyone when there dogs have been diagnosed with lymphoma and went down that route of chemo, much success, the dogs were just miserable. I say that especially the last person I knew her 6 year old OES a few years back, had it, she went the chemo way, he was miserable, sick,vomitted and had diarreah the whole time, lost a lot of weight and she had trouble even getting him to eat and drink during his treatment also lost all his hair and after treatment was completed only lasted another 3 months. She now says if she knew what she knew back then, what her dog experienced in the last 6 months of his life she would of just gave palative care and made his last months of life happy and comfortable, she would never go down that route again if any dog she has in the future had Lymphoma. My heart broke for heart, we have all known her here since a bubbie, so I just want to say even though we live worlds apart know we are thinking of you, dino and precious Miss Heart Enjoy the nationals with her, great you are going it will be good for you both, making every day count so the memories are more when the time comes when you have to let her go,huge Hugs to you all |
| Thanks, Lisa...and although I am going with my gut on the chemo...I am of course second guessing my decision. But I have heard stories about the ravages that Chemo treatments do to their already weak bodies. Thank you for your caring..it makes both of us feel very special. |
Didn't find exactly what you're looking for? Search again here:
Custom Search
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|