Just a small self-pity party
 Don't get me wrong - this is exactly what is supposed to happen and I did know it was coming, but when it actually happens, it's still a small shock to the system. 
It was just the 3 of us moving everything on Friday, so by that night we were just this side of dead. Her condo's ground level is just the garage and entry door. The living area is on the 2nd floor and the bedrooms are on the 3rd floor. Ouch, their aching backs! I can't carry heavy stuff because of my back, so my job was to move everything from the back of the rental truck to the front so they could get at it easier. Poor Sarah lugged ALL the boxes up both flights of steps, plus helped Dale with the furniture. 
So now it's just us, and I don't like it one bit - at least, for right now. I'm sure I'll get used to it, but after being in Mom-mode for 26+ years, this is strange, foreign territory. I can actually think of us first, even sometimes think of ME first. Hey! This may not be so bad after all . . . |
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Chris...I know exactly how you feel....when my 3 left (about 6 years ago) it took us a while to get US back....soooo busy with THEM!!! 
But, as you said, this is the way it should be...and, as for me, now, I can concentrate on my passions...Therapy work with Pearl and hopefully, Heart..and just enjoying our time together (me and Dino), doing anything we want whenever we want....And making new friends through this website, STLOES Club, Sheepiepalooza and going to the Nationals for the first time!!!! It IS a great time in our lives now!!! ENJOY!!!!!! |
| I have no experience to share or sage ol' wisdom either, but I think it will be something that won't take that long to get used to! How about fostering a dog or two???? wink wink!
Actually, after 26+ years, I think it's past time for you, so enjoy, relax and sleep in if you dare. Best of luck you empty nest lady! L |
| Know how you are feeling...I was so happy to have the dogs greet me when I came home...way too quiet! I still miss those years BUT I am enjoying the fact that my daughter is married, a teacher, and yes, the best, we have a beautiful 3 month old grandaughter! That's just the best...you get to love them, hug them, buy great things for them but you still have your own life with plenty of time to do what you want to do. We purposely bought our home 2 hours away so our daughter would have her own family without us around too much...if it was up to me I would stop by every day to see the baby...now we go one day a week and now that she's back teaching I know that may be too much as she has less time with her husband and baby and we don't want to be there too much. It makes holidays and family get togethers even more special. You have so much fun ahead of you...watching your daughter grow, begin her own life, and even more great times ahead...just different. The grandchild experience is the BEST!!! |
| Time to hit the day spa,
and then pick up 2 Sheepie puppies for your empty nest. 
Enjoy your free time!  |
| I'm sorry that you're sad. I wish I could help!
Say, listen: If it makes you feel any better, you could bake me a cookie and send it along! I promise to cherish it and relish it as if it came from my own mother.
Then again, you could do the same for your daughter... 
Sit back for a few and have a good cry, then be filled with the warmth of knowing you've done a great job. So far. |
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| I really do know how you feel and I wish I could tell you it goes away but it doesn't. It gets easier but once you have spent that many years doing something you always have an empty spot. My kids have been gone a lot of years I still wish they were home.
You have a double wammy with just losing Drez. It just MIGHT be the right time to get a puppy |
I have a 13 and 16 year old you can borrow them any time  Please.  |
| Chris, Chris, Chris!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Big huge hugs! My son left for California last week. I'M EMPTY!!!! I've talked to him several times a day and that helps..but it so darned quiet! We did our jobs really well! We should be proud! We should rejoice! We should get sh*t faced!!! Hugs to you and me! We will survive...and our kids will thrive. Deborah |
| Thats a big move! I'm glad everything went well despite all the heavy furniture with the floors! |
| Sorry Chris, I am sure you're not alone with the empty nest feeling...
Now it's time for you & Dale to go out and have some FUN!!! |
| Thanks, everyone - especially the moms who know what it feels like!
Val, I know I'll enjoy this newfound freedom soon - just have to go through withdrawal to get there! Leslie, I wish I could sleep in! But still earning a paycheck prevents that. Ihall15, I'm definitely looking forward to being a grandmother. Not in the foreseeable future, though, from either child. Spencer insists he won't even get engaged until he's at least 30 (he's 26), and Sarah is just starting her teaching career. Joan, thanks for the cheers. After all this, I'm not sure I'm ready to be a puppy mom again. Have to get used to being able to come and go as we please for awhile, I think. Ron, I don't have to bake and send anything to my daughter - she bakes more than I do! She should send some home to me! She's often said that she's one of the few in her circle of friends who actually cooks. Guess it's not a skill everyone learns any more . . . Lori, thanks for the hugs! On to life's next phase . . . Ginny, you are so right, it has been a double whammy what with just losing Drez, too. And I really don't mind the kids living on their own, I just wish they lived on their on nearby. ej - 13 and 16? Are you kidding?? I don't think I want to go thru teen years again on a bet!! Deb, yep - we're in the same boat at the same time. Modern communication makes it easy to talk to them frequently, but there are times when I just want a real hug, ya know? We did do our jobs really well, and we should be really proud (and I am), and we should definitely get sh*t faced! Our kids will be just fine, thanks to their mothers! Hugs back to you! Emily, you're just starting your parenthood journey. Savor every little moment - it goes by WAY too fast! Deb, yep! Now it's US time. Just have to try to remember what to do!! |
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| Chris I want to join your self pity Party, I know how you and dale are feeling, we are still partial empty nesters but it is hard to let our babies go even though we fully expect them not to be home forever.
I'll bring the Sympathy Drinkies.
Sucks our babies have to grow up and get on with their own lives, hard for mommies and daddys. Burp, pardon me, must be that darn coke in the drinkies mix.
Hugs to you all, now is the time to splash out and spend quality time on both you and dale and do all those things you were putting off doing while the kids were dependant on you both. |
| you will be fine
you never know thanks giving anf christmas and they might come running for moms home cooked holiday dinners i thought it was bad enough when my three year old dragged his bedding outside and was going to sleeping in his tent all by himself in the yard this summer. he still has to do what mommy tells him so inside he came but i think i will have to let this one go early he always be way to indipendant. i'll just try and enjoy the next 16 years. zoe |
| Zoe,
just wait til he packs his suitcase to run away from home!! i remember my neighbor Scotty (same age at time 4) ran away from home. He moved into my play house in the backyard. I made us peanut butter and Jelly sandwiches and we stayed the wholllllleeee day until my mom made him go home....... Now of course they KNEW he was there all day long....... but let us pretend. Ali ahhh but life would be so simple again........... |
| Chris, you can always do what I did when we lost Mopsy and I was sending my youngest off to college - get another "child".
Now I know you don't want to do the puppy thing again but we got our guy at six months old and it was great. It was so strange to take Harry on walks with me after having to leave Mopsy at home. We both like having him but unlike a human child you can leave him home alone. Without a doubt our life is more fun with him in it. Have you ever seen a more spoiled "child" than Harry? It is like the best of everything as far as responsibility yet we have the fun of a kid. Just think about it......... a slightly older "puppy" gets you over some of the bumps. |
| It does take some time to adjust to being just the two of you. Honestly, I did not expect that: I had looked forward to it for a long time.
Of course, in our case, it's not a forever kind of thing: kids still home for vacations or between apartments. Just got the word that our son who has been in the Army for 4 yrs was discharged today and home tomorrow! Looking forward to this tremendously, as it has been a hard four years. He will stay with us short term and perhaps until he finishes school, but I have a feeling he won't want to stay that long. We'll see. Just found out he was cheated out of his enlistment bonus that they kept postponing giving him for 4 years, part of which was served in Afghanistan Now they say he waited too long--although it was the army who kept 'losing' his paperwork. Ok, that was my pity party. Just frustrating: the army kept him for 2 extra months because they kept losing his paperwork......And that's not even the bad stuff. |
| i'll let you guys know............ with Norm coming home for a minimum of 6 months probably we will be learing to be married again.............
just like old times in the USMC.... |
| Not sure what we want to do yet about another dog. This newfound freedom is kinda nice! We can come and go as we please without having about hurrying home because of the dog, can get away week-ends to go see the kids, can sleep late on week-ends. It's not a life I've known until now, and I'd kinda like to take advantage of it a little before we adopt again.
Of course, we will adopt again, just not sure when. Can't go forever without a fluffball running around the house. Plus, it was always comforting when Dale travels to have Drez in the house with me. tgir, I'm so glad your son is coming home safely! The rest you can deal with when he gets home, but the best part will be that first hug. Ali, it will almost be like you're newlyweds again! |
| Chris, give yourselves a few weeks to acclimate, then schedule a weekend get-away. Before you go schedule the delivery of a hot tub
Miss them, but enjoy. |
| Son's back and his first day home, he registered for university classes to finish his degreee, so I'm happy.
It is nice to be able to visit your children and to have them come home. We tend to appreciate each other more, I think. This summer we took the first all family vacation we have taken in...12 years or more. Only the second in our 30 years of marriage. Had all 4 kids and hubby in a beach house in North Carolina. Army son was able to join us just for a few days, but it was really great. My oldest son was unexpectedly especially appreciative. He had been going through some pretty serious stress/transition stuff, and so getting away was especially good for him. Because we do it so rarely, I splurged and booked a nice house which had enough bedrooms so we could all have our own, and with plenty of bathrooms it was especially nice. Great blend of together time with ample opportunity to retire to your own room when you wanted/needed. I wish I was rich enough to have a cabin or lake house that we could all share and retreat to.. Ah, well. Maybe I will win the lottery some day. |
| This weekend we are taking my daughter off to college in VA. I know how you feel. It seems at my house we lose a kid gain a dog. :D:D:D |
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