Remo's declining health and insensitive people
At night I've been putting a rolled up towel between his legs. like a body pillow, because I have arthritis in my hips from a long ago car accident and having a pillow between my knees helps me. I don't know if it's helping him or not but he doesn't move from it. I heat a sheet in the dryer and put over him and he usually still has it on him when I check on him the next morning. I know I'm fighting a forest fire with a water gun and I need to let him cross with some dignity. I've been struggling with this and trying to medicate him for the weeks hoping for a miracle. But the miracle is that I've been blessed to have him for 15 years. How much more can I ask of him? I had to work today and called to talk to my vet. When I hung up I had to meet up with a man I work with. I work in male dominated field. I told him I was a little late because I was talking to the vet. I didn't tell him anything else and he said "what you need to do is put the dog down". I told him to mind his own business. He said "I have a 25 cent cure" and made to motion shooting a gun. He said "it's cheaper than a vet". I called him a name I'll not type here, started crying a left. He never did appologise. Some people are just horrible. For the past couple of weeks I've been talking pics of Remo right and left. I can't have too many. When I get home tonight I'll post a few and you can see for yourselfs just how pitiful he's looking compared to just a couple of months ago. Sorry to ramble on, I just had to vent. Thanks for listening. |
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| I've got a 25 cent solution for that guy in your office. People like that shouldn't be allowed to exist with the rest of us. |
| Yes, it's not a "male" thing but it does run high in that sex. Remember men are not sensitive creatures the way women are..........they can be influenced and develop it, but it doesn't come naturally.
You are working with men, don't expect much compassion and don't be surprised when it is totally lacking in others. When I was with the Forest Service, the secretary lost her dog to a hit and run. She cried for days. I stood back and observed the men's reaction......it ranged from "get over it lady" to "kind words." I later learned the Mr. "kind words" had an ancient blind, severely arthritic dog at home he couldn't part with. When working with men, try to rachet down the emotions.......I know, we wear them on the outside, but try. You know here we feel your emotional pain as we've been there. It's an ugly place. |
| It's not just a male thing... some people don't get the bond we form with our animals.
It's also a workplace thing... I can only offer kind words in a world where a shoulder embrace can cost me a career. I remember a woman who lost her cat and was sooo upset by it, and I felt so sad that all I could do was tilt my head and offer verbal sympathy. |
| i am so sorry....yeah, i got 25 cents worth of potty mouth for him too....
kiss remo for me |
| What a horrible person. You will do the kind thing for Remo when the time is right. xxx
I had a yorkie years ago that had a tumour. The yorkie ate, slept, but every now and then used to limp. I carried her around a lot and she loved it, it was like going lazy walks. This person I spoke to in the street sometimes, said you should have that dog put down. At the time my father in law was seriously ill in hospital and we were coping with that, my father in law died Christmas Day and I had my dog pts on 27th December. Sometimes you cant let go....  |
| I am sorry that this is happening. Before we got Baloo we had a Beagle named Baxter that was with us for a great 15 years too. I can completely relate to how you are feeling. I literally felt like one of my children were leaving me. It was horrible at the time. When he finally passed away -- even though we knew it was coming-- it was such a blow that I was miserable for a very long time.
Took 2 years for me to move on from Bax....we finally got Baloo and he is a complete opposite of Baxter-- but he melted my heart instantly. Took less than 3 seconds and I was a goner! Hang in there. Give Remo lots of love. |
I am so sorry that you are going through this bad time with Remo. Some people say whatever comes into their brains (if they have any) and let it flow right out. I have always found it is harder to be mean then sympathetic. People, like the guy you work with, are self absorbed idiots who only see as far as the end of their nose. Ignore him, you've already given him more of your time/thoughts then he deserves...save it all for your baby Remo.  to you and Remo! |
| I too work in an office where people think I am nuts because of my passion for rescue and sheepies. I just ignore them and wish that one day they would understand the joy that I feel when I come home to "my babies".
We know you will do what is best for Remo. Keep your chin up. |
| I am so sorry you are having to deal with this, it must be heartbreaking. What an ass your co worker is!!!!!! |
Ashley I wrote: I had to work today and called to talk to my vet. When I hung up I had to meet up with a man I work with. I work in male dominated field. I told him I was a little late because I was talking to the vet. I didn't tell him anything else and he said "what you need to do is put the dog down". I told him to mind his own business. He said "I have a 25 cent cure" and made to motion shooting a gun. He said "it's cheaper than a vet". I called him a name I'll not type here, started crying a left. He never did appologise. Some people are just horrible.
For the past couple of weeks I've been talking pics of Remo right and left. I can't have too many. When I get home tonight I'll post a few and you can see for yourselfs just how pitiful he's looking compared to just a couple of months ago. Sorry to ramble on, I just had to vent. Thanks for listening. Sounds like HE has never had unconditional love or even given it. So it His loss. Tell the excuse for a man(term used very reluctantly) to stick his thought up his A**e as this is where it belongs 
You will know when the time is right and Remo will let you know
Just do what you think is right and enjoy the time you have.. My thoughts are with you at this hard time take care of you both Sharon & Oliver |
| I'm so sorry to here about Remo. I hope he feels better soon. Pain killers can make people constipated and antibiotics can give you diarrhea. I imagine it would have the same effect on our pets.
As for that man in your office, he was way out of line and needs to have the worse UTI and constipation possible. He needs a 25 cent cure !!!! I think you handled yourself well. It doesnt sound like this man has much empathy. So sorry you had to hear something like that when you're worried about your Remo.
Hope he feels better soon, but you'll know what is right and when the right time is for Remo to pass. :ghugs: |
| I'm so sorry to hear about Remo. Your coworker sounds like a jerk. My boyfriend recently had a similar experience when a coworker told him to put his dog down instead of getting her ACL surgery. It totally baffles me that people can be that insensitive. |
| Thank you guys for your support and well wishes. Remo is holding his own tonight. I brought him upstairs in the living room with me and made him a bed. We've just been hanging out tonight. He's laying on a heating pad now sleeping. He ate really good tonight. I boiled him some chicken and loved it. Still no poopie but a lot of gas.
As for my co-worker, he's not the first person to say insensitive things in the guise of "kidding" but he picked the wrong person and the wrong time. I'm sure he won't do it again, to me anyway. |
| We went through a few weeks of illness before losing Theeps, and I'd fight the exact same fight again, even knowing the outcome.
When you love someone you know in your heart what to do, and you don't give up until you know for sure it is time. In our case a week of treatment meant a few more good days with him. Some car rides, a trip or two for ice cream. Worth every single moment. As heart wrenching as it was (still is, these months later) I am grateful for every moment. Your coworker was a complete jerk. Everyone else with a heart knows what you are doing and why and is one hundred percent behind you. All are best thoughts to you and your sheepie. And the fact that he ate well today is really good news. I wish you guys nothing but the best. Tracie (and her boys...) |
| Hi Ashley,
Your post hit close to home for me for several reasons. The first being most people never understand my total dedication to my animals - but I am at the point where I no longer care. Still, insensitive words hurt when they are directed at a beloved one. Remo is so important to you that the jerks comments wounded. What an insensitive oaf he is! My ole Blue is very aged and I really get upset when people make a comment regarding he needs to be put down without knowing any of the circumstances. I feel for you with Remo as only you and you alone can ever make that decision and from your post would go to the ends of the earth to make his life happier. I'm the same with Blue. So here's hugs to you and although I wish I could say or do something that took away the grief you felt by his comments..know that all of us here at the forum..know exactly how you must have felt. Marianne |
Tasker's Mom wrote: I am so sorry you are having to deal with this, it must be heartbreaking. What an ass your co worker is!!!!!!
Ditto! |
| Just ignore them!
There is a black crossbreed who lives in my street. They take him over the park every day, he is about 16 years old. now to see him you would think...OMG poor dog! he walks funny, both his front legs sort of splay out and he has a peculiar stumble trip walk. I was talking to his owner the other week, it turns out about 12 months ago the poor dog was attacked by a staffie cross in the park. They rushed him across to the vets which is opposite the park. The vet wanted to pts the dog, but the owner wouldnt . So they operated on him, both tendons in his front legs were severely damaged. It took him about 6 weeks to recover and that is why he walks like he does. His owner says he eats, sleeps and is happy. He loves going over the park but is understandably very wary of other dogs. So the moral of this story, is PEOPLE SHOULDNT MAKE JUDGMENTS! |
| People that says insensitive things like your co-worker did are the ones who have lost out. Obviously they have never known the unconditional love & devotion a pet can bring into one's life. I have friends who don't have pets & once they asked "How can you stand all that hair? UGH". Or "Don't you think that's a lot to spend on a dog?" I thought "What a stupid thing to say!" First, you have the companionship of something that is always happy to see you even if all you do is talk to it while you walk around the house! Secondly, if you do any kind of competition with your dogs at all, you have that special bond built thru training that these kind of people will never experience. When I lost Melody back in Novemeber I remember my one friend telling me she knew how much it hurt to lose a very special dog. But she bet I wouldn't trade the 11+ wonderful years & had with Melody for anything in the world, even if it meant going thru all that pain again. That about summed it up. |
| Ashley..I am so sorry you have to deal with Remo's problems AND on top of that insensitive comments. We all know how you feel here and will support you.
I wish I had this forum when I had to help my Millie cross Rainbow Bridge 5 years ago. I made the decision on a Monday and took Tuesday off..I just couldn't stop crying and missing her. On Wednesday, when I went back, one of my coworkers said something like, "Are you all right NOW?" Meaning..it's been a day, get over it. She is NOT an animal person and does not understand why anyone would have a dog (cat) to share their lives with. (Millie was my baby for 14 years...) The following weeks were very hard for me. There were 2 people in the office who were supportive and caring to what I was going through, but the rest of them just didn't have a clue. It was very hard to hide my feelings...I would just get to the bathroom and cry, compose myself and get back to work. I sure wish I had this forum then.... Come to us for all the support you need...the H@@@ with anyone else who just don't Get IT!!!!!! |
Just when I think I can't be shocked at how cruel people can be along comes a jerk like that guy  . When the time comes we will be here for you, in the meantime hugs to you and very gentle hugs to your special boy. Remo is a lucky boy to have such a wonderful mom. |
| I hope that you and Remo enjoy many more cozy, wonderful, loving days together. You are being so good to your precious boy and that's all that matters. Enjoy your sweetie for as long as you have him and know that we will all be here for you when it gets too hard for both of you. |
| Ugh that guy you had to meet makes me sick. Don't think on it though, this is a time for beautiful positive thoughts only. Give Remo lots of cuddles from me. Be strong, you are doing all the right things. |
| Having just gone through this a few weeks back, I can fully understand how you will do anything to keep Remo comfortable and with you. And only you can decide when enough is enough for him. That coworker of yours had better be single, because if not, I'm sure he's used that "sense of humor" on his wife, and that she didn't like it any more than you did.
Be strong, and know we're here for you. |
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