My depressed friend
A month ago we made plans to go shopping (Sephora) this Sunday. I can tell she is not at all interested in going. This morning I asked her via e-mail if she still wanted to go and her reply was "yes, but I don't know what time they open." WTF? Usually she would be totally psyched and be talking about this for days. I know from the past not to talk to her about this because she'll deny that anything is wrong. So my question is: do I tell her I can sense she doesn't want to go and let her off the hook, or do I figure I gave her the chance to back out, she didn't take it, and this is her problem to deal with?? |
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| I think the question to ask yourself regarding the shopping trip is....do you still want to go with her knowing how unexcited she is? If so, then go unless she backs out. If not, give her another chance to back out, or back out yourself. |
| I think you should go ahead with the planned shopping. If she really is progressing further in her depression, staying home, being more isolated can't be helpful.
It may not be the fun trip you envisioned, but maybe it can be a stepping stone to getting her back to a more healthier place. |
| I agree with Dawn. Staying home and being isolated will just feed her depression. It should be good for her to get out, although, she may not be a barrel of fun for you.
With any psychological problem, there is always the tendency for the person to stop with the medication because they feel fine. I've seen that battle back and forth a million times with my mom. It's really hard to convince them that the medication is the reason they feel fine!   |
| Been there done that, my own husband is like that. Very hard if she does not want to go, she won't. The house can be on fire and they will not get out of bed. Sometimes shopping will brighten them up, but thats because when they are low spending does seem to make them happy?? Do we understand, no. Stand by them and be their friends yes. Tell them to get over it, no. They can not help, she felt better because meds were working. She should go on meds again. Bad cycle. I live with I know and its very hard. |
| What happened Sunday? Did you go? Were you able to talk to her? |
| We went and had a pleasant day. Although we've been friends for over 15 years, she does not like to talk about her feelings or anything "deep." She tells me something and that's it. There will be no more discussion. So I didn't bring up anything about her mental well-being. |
| Well, that was a good start.
At least she kept the date and went out shopping with you. That is a good sign. Any more activities planned? |
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